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Discussing End-of-Life With a Family Member


Medical professionals and counselors who deal with families facing end-of-life issues offer a few suggestions to the rest of us on “how to start a conversation” when we have a very sick loved one. They say the first thing to consider is having the conversation in one’s kitchen is a whole lot easier than having it in the hospital. It may also encourage your family to start the conversation if they learn that studies find families who have talked about it beforehand express less feelings of guilt after the person passes away. Moreover, they say they had an easier time grieving and were less likely to experience depression.

The type of questions to ask to get a conversation started include “what does the person value most about their life?” Other topics of discussion could be to find out what the person understands about their illness; what matters most to them at the end of life; how they want to handle medical decisions; and what their fears and physical needs are.

As a family member, you need to remember to practice active listening. It is important to leave your own views out of the discussion and try to understand what the person is feeling. Find out if they want to spend their last days at home; and who do they wish to be surrounded by as they face death. This is also a good time to encourage them to express their wishes regarding burial.

Ask if the person has an advance directive, which is a legally binding document that gives instructions for healthcare if they are no longer able to make or communicate those decisions themselves. This can include their wishes around discontinuing treatment and medications; and saves the family from having to make difficult decisions.

At the top-rated MorningStar at River Oaks, our beautiful home offers assisted living in Houston’s Upper Kirby District. Suites are available in a variety of floor plans featuring quartz countertops and custom cabinetry, walk-in closets and floor-to-ceiling windows. We provide an array of hospitality and senior care services, luxury amenities, signature wellness programs and a full calendar of activities. In addition, our distinct Reflections Neighborhood is devoted to the individualized care of those with Alzheimer’s and other dementia-related diseases. Contact us for more information and to schedule a tour.

MorningStar has considered it a privilege and responsibility to “cast a new light” on senior living, inspired and empowered by our unique mission: to honor, to value, to invest. Our passionate commitment to serving seniors has proudly earned us a reputation for satisfaction that is second to none. Contact us to learn more about the finest independent living Houston offers. 

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